Jeremy Clarkson Says He Thinks About Dying 'A Lot'

He then goes on to share his thoughts on the ageing process, while ruling out any chance of him joining a gym to try and keep youthful. 

Speaking to those who try and stave off the years by ‘sweating and grunting’ in a gym, Clarkson wrote: “At best you’ll look like a pipe cleaner in a ball sack. And you still won’t be able to run the hundred metres in 11 seconds or do pole-vaulting or swim a length underwater or win the Tour de France.”

However, he did reveal that he enjoys a nice leisurely walk where he can stop and look at interesting birds’ nests. Fair enough. 

Despite mainly bashing the prospect of getting older, Clarkson did admit that one up-side was that he no longer had to worry about what he looked like. 

The TV personality said that while those with fewer miles on the clock ‘need to be attractive so that you can have sexual intercourse’ - that wasn’t a concern for the over 60s. 

Elsewhere in the column, Clarkson rounded up a list of male celebrities who were also turning 62 this year - including Hugh Grant, Jonathan Ross, Bono, Gary Linker and Antonio Banderas - to see who was ‘faring better’ through the ageing process. 

Here, Clarkson didn’t hold back on the self-deprecation, admitting that ‘all of them are, if I’m honest. Except perhaps Jonathan Ross'.

He went on: “And that irritates me. I’m in a battle here with Kenneth Branagh and, though we’ve never met, you can be assured he’s in a battle with me. And he knows he’s winning. He can look at a photograph of me and then himself in the mirror and he’ll think, ‘Yup. I’m in the lead'.”