Relationship expert explains best and worst things she found out from going celibate for three months

A relationship expert made the decision to go celibate for three months, and documented all the pros and cons of her experience.

It may seem daunting and difficult, but celibacy might be the way forwards, if social media is to be believed.

That's right, a TikTok trend is going around that is celebrating and encouraging celibacy, and all power to people that are taking part in it.

It doesn't stop there though, celebrities are in on the hot new trend too, with Lady Gaga and Lenny Kravitz preaching about the mental health benefits of giving up sex - apparently it clears your mind and improves your decision-making as well.

The expert shared her experience online. (Jana Hocking/Instagram)

Seems like it's all positives on the surface, but the hormones have to go somewhere, surely?

Well, sex and relationships expert Jana Hocking went ahead and took celibacy on for three months, so you don't have to.

Despite some initial reservations on the idea at first, believing that a heated session in bed is the best way to relieve stress, she decided to give it a go anyway.

Three months, dating normally, and by her words, she 'didn't put out once' as she was the 'queen of blue balls'.

Jana had a number of realisations during this period, and shared the pros and cons she got from abstaining from sex in a piece for the New York Post.

Pro - It separated the nice guys from the time-wasters

It turns out that a lot of guys assume that sex is guaranteed on the first date nowadays, and though she said she would be offended if a good-looking chap didn't try to get her in bed after a date, she said their reactions to her saying 'no' was crazy.

Two of the dates tried to shoot her some thirsty texts after the fact too, offering to come over or to 'have some fun'.

Clearly not looking for a real connection, Jana revealed that guys who were cool with the decision are still around. Fair play.

Some thirsty individuals continued to persist, even after she left. (Getty Stock Photo)

Con - Sexual frustrations

A generally expected side-effect, she joked that a nip of wind in the right area would get her going during the three months, asking why we are wired to want something when we know we can't have it.

She listed: "I don’t know why people are saying it clears the mind - for me, it made me think of nothing but sex."

Pro - Self confidence

Jana admitted that she felt empowered when she had the upper hand when it came to sex, calling the feeling of sexual tension 'glorious', saying that it makes the wait even more worthwhile.

"Well, not technically on the first go, that’s fairly quick. But the second go, well, that’s worth waiting for," she said.

Con - Grumpiness

A known method of releasing dopamine, she said that it's a great way to stop the brain from thinking about the hardships of everyday life, and without it, you're left with every single one of your thoughts.

Jana stated: "You never want to be left with ALL of them."

Jana said that while it was empowering, she felt sexually frustrated and grumpy. (Getty Stock Photo)

She then went to OnlyFans couple and relationship experts Stace and Ty for their opinions on the trend, as they labelled it 'ridiculous'.

They explained: “How do you discover what you do/don’t want sexually if you’re not having sex?

"In our line of work, I would encourage individuals to deeply understand why they want to explore celibacy and to work on the fundamental, underlying issue rather than using sex as a scapegoat.

“Unless they have experienced trauma, which is a different conversation, I would encourage them to be open-minded and not close off anything completely."

Saying that sex and relationships can be 'an impactful teacher for self-discovery', the couple say to stay true to your own values while exploring.

Jana concluded by saying that she will not be doing it again, while reluctantly saying that she was glad she gave it a go - sort of.