If you wanted to go to Jeremy Clarkson’s restaurant up at Diddly Squat Farm, then tough luck – you’re too late – but here’s what it would have cost had you decided to go whilst it was still open.
Here's the trailer for season two of Clarkson's Farm in case you haven't caught up yet. But do bear in mind that we'll be discussing that second season below, though.
If you've been keeping up with the second instalment of Clarkson’s Farm over on Amazon Prime, then you’ll know that Clarkson and his team decided to open up a restaurant to flog the produce of the farm, but ended up in a tiresome and lengthy argument with the local council in Oxfordshire.
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In the end, Chadlington Parish Council rejected his planning application, before Clarkson – in a pretty in-character move – decided that he’d just build it anyway.
He discovered what he described as a ‘delightful little loophole’ which meant that the location of the restaurant was just changed to be in a barn that had already been built on the farm premises.
In the end, it did open and started out as a great success, but the West Oxfordshire District Council quickly got in touch with a list of orders that had to be fulfilled in six weeks if the place was to stay open.
That deadline quickly elapsed without the orders being met, meaning that the restaurant had to close down.
But, what could you have expected if you had managed to get a booking during that brief window, and how much would it have cost?
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Perhaps it’s not as steep as you might think.
Before it shut down, it was possible to book a spot at the restaurant on OpenTable, with the restaurant only allowing tables of four.
That makes sense, as on the show they say they’ve got room for 40 covers, which is four tables of 10 people.
There was also a VIP room which offered extra sparkling wine, that – as we’ll reveal – costs a bit extra.
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As far as the food on offer went, the ‘small, outdoors, and rustic’ restaurant didn’t actually have a menu, but diners were told to expect snacks as well as a ‘roast and a pudding’.
Basically, whatever they had on the day from the farm, that’s what they’d serve.
They also had a bread made with local Hawkstone Lager that was described as ‘absolutely brilliant’.
It’s pretty vague, but it’s hard to go too far wrong with a roast and a pudding.
In total, the whole experience was priced at £49 per person, with that aforementioned VIP experience costing £69 per person.
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Not that you can go there anymore, anyway.
Ultimately, Clarkson decided against fighting the council’s decision, although those who worked on behalf of Diddly Squat Farm did say that they thought the six weeks deadline wasn’t enough time, and that the required changes were ‘excessive’.
Six months to change – they said – would have been ‘more reasonable’.
Still, he’s got the TV money to fall back on, which is more than a lot of farmers have.
Featured Image Credit: Peter Titmuss / Lily Alice / Alamy Stock PhotoTopics: Amazon Prime, Food And Drink, Jeremy Clarkson, UK News, Clarkson's Farm