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The London Underground parody song came out 19 years ago and hardly anything has changed

Joe Harker

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The London Underground parody song came out 19 years ago and hardly anything has changed

Nearly two decades ago, a couple of friends decided they were so sick of the state of the London Underground that they thought they'd do a song about it.

Luckily, these two had already formed a band called Amateur Transplants, so clearly they had some musical talent and ended up making one of the internet's earlier big sensations.

Performed by Suman Biswas and Adam Kay (that guy who wrote This Is Going To Hurt), the song gets to grips with some of their most common gripes with the tube.

Voicing complaints which many have had about the state of the Underground, it's eerie and quite depressing how the song basically doesn't need updating at all.

"Where the f**ks my f**king train?" Sang the parody song. Credit: eye35 / Alamy Stock Photo
"Where the f**ks my f**king train?" Sang the parody song. Credit: eye35 / Alamy Stock Photo

The lyrics complain that 'I want my f**king money back' and 'we're all late for work again', and the song struck a chord with so many people that they downloaded it millions of times.

Singing that the 'floors are sticky, the seats are damp' to the tune of 'Going Underground' by The Jam is a complaint that's never going out of style.

Then there's another part of the song, which goes: "Where the f**k's my f**king train? London Underground, London Underground.

"They're all lazy f**king useless c***s. London Underground, London Underground. They're all greedy c***s. I want to shoot them all with a rifle."

Honestly, 19 years on the sentiment is one still shared by plenty of Underground passengers each and every day.

The parody song became a big hit in the 00s, being downloaded over four million times on iTunes. Credit: incamerastock / Alamy Stock Photo
The parody song became a big hit in the 00s, being downloaded over four million times on iTunes. Credit: incamerastock / Alamy Stock Photo

Really selling the quintessential tube experience, they go on to sing: "What you smell is what you get, Burger King and piss and sweat. You roast to death in the boiling heat, with tourists treading on your feet, and chewing gum on every seat."

Even the snazzy new Elizabeth Line can't say it's managed to grow beyond these old accusations.

One area with the song where we do have a bone to pick is with the lyric 'don't tell me to mind the gap' ever since we found out the reason why one of the stations still plays the old version.

Weird stuff happens on the tube on a pretty regular basis, like the recent spate of people riding around the Underground in their undies for no other reason other than it being a bit of fun.

It's not like it's going to stop people from doing their usual routine of steadfastly avoiding all human interaction until it's time to get off at their stop.

London's a busy place and lots of people have important places to be, whether your train is full of people missing their trousers or not doesn't change that.

Then there's the crew who set up their own Christmas dinner laden table on the tube and decided to tuck into a festive treat on the go.

Serving up feast of meat, cheese, bread and washing it down with mulled wine, they proved that sometimes it's more about the journey than the destination.

In honour of the London Underground parody song we'll end on the track's final line, 'take your Oyster card and shove it up your a**ehole'.

Featured Image Credit: Justin Kase zsixz / Alamy Stock Photo/Greg Balfour Evans / Alamy Stock Photo

Topics: London, Music, Viral

Joe Harker

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