Woman Places Ring In Kinder Egg Inside Herself To Propose To Boyfriend
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A woman gave her husband quite the Kinder Surprise when she hid an engagement ring for him in a Kinder egg - placed inside of her vagina.
The story of the woman, who has for obvious reasons not been named, is told by former junior doctor Adam Kay, who has packaged some of the stories from his time on the front lines of the NHS into a book, This Is Going To Hurt: Confessions Of A Junior Doctor, a novelisation of his time as an obstetrician and gynaecologist.
She reported to have performed the somewhat unusual method of wooing her prospective husband as part of the tradition of women proposing to men on 29 February, which occurs exclusively in leap years.
"(She) decided to take advantage of tradition and propose to her boyfriend - going to the expense of buying an engagement ring, the trouble of putting it inside a Kinder Surprise egg and the imagination of inserting it vaginally," writes Kay.
"She would suggest some finger-work to her partner, he would discover it, retrieve it, and then she would go down on one knee (and, presumably, him).
"Equal parts unexpected, disgusting and, I suppose, romantic."
The problem came when the Kinder Egg, which was inserted vertically, turn horizontal inside of the woman's vagina and became lodged.
"No amount of shoogling from either of them would get this particular goose to lay her golden egg," explains Kay.
"Remarkably, she was so keen to maintain the surprise she wouldn't tell him what she'd done or why."
"She popped the question and he said yes; presumably out of shock, or fear of what a woman who does that with a Kinder Surprise would do to him if spurned."
Once he had accepted the proposal, the happy couple sped off to hospital, where they were attended to by Kay.
He managed to remove the egg with forceps and presented the fiance with it - alongside a pair of latex gloves.
Thankfully he accepted - though one has to imagine that the decision was made a hell of a lot more difficult than it needed to be by the somewhat unusual circumstances.
Still, in their years of presumably happy marriage, they can take a respite from the monotony of it all by continually having to invent new stories about how they met and how she finally popped the question to him.
This Is Going To Hurt: Confessions Of A Junior Doctor is out now, published by Picador.