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Relationship expert says one common habit could be ruining your sex life

Relationship expert says one common habit could be ruining your sex life

There's one thing couples aren't doing which could be ruining their sex lives.

A pair of relationship experts have lifted the lid on the very common thing which people who aren't having a great sex life fail to do.

Everybody wants a good sex life, don't they?

Especially when the flipside is having one which is basically keeping the word 'moribund' from falling out of use.

If your sex life is about as healthy and active as someone who has been comatose in hospital for the past 30 years, then there's all sorts of things you can, and probably should do, try to rectify this.

Appearing on a recent episode of the Diary of a CEO podcast, doctors John and Julie Gottman shared what they considered to be the key things to know about having a fun and fruitful relationship.

They ought to know all about that, having been married for 36 years and counting while spending decades researching relationships.

Who doesn't love a good kiss and cuddle every now and then? People with horrendous sex lives apparently.
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"There are really about a dozen things that people do and have a great sex life - saying, 'I love you' every day and meaning it is one of them, giving compliments, romantic gifts, having a lot of touch," John said about the keys to a great sex life, before moving onto one of the main differences between couples that enjoyed their sex life and those that didn't.

"Of the people who don't cuddle, only four per cent of them said they had a great sex life. Ninety-six per cent of the non-cuddlers had an awful sex life.

"Touch is very important important - even physical touch and public affection was a big thing."

He also recommended that the optimal time for a kiss was six seconds, though we can't recommend that you crack out the stopwatch and begin timing yourself as that might end up killing the mood.

The reason why this works is because kissing for six seconds or hugging for 20 releases oxytocin, which makes you feel safe and connected psychologically.

Oh dear, something's gone quite wrong here.
Getty Stock Photo

There are plenty of other relationship experts offering their tips for a good time together.

One suggested that people in relationships had much to learn from the BDSM community by seeing sex as an opportunity for some fun and play, while exercising a healthy understanding of the boundaries of consent.

Meanwhile, if you're having a bit of trouble getting in a relationship in the first place, there's a few body language things you can do to help build a connection.

Mimicking someone's movements can really help develop a feeling of synchronicity between people, and if you're into somebody you might end up doing this without realising it.

Removing obstacles and distractions like phones or actual physical barriers between you also helped hugely.

Best of luck, lovebirds!

Featured Image Credit: Youtube/ Diary of a CEO

Topics: Sex and Relationships, Dating trends, YouTube