'Roaching' is the new dating trend that people don't even realise is happening to them

Home> Lifestyle

'Roaching' is the new dating trend that people don't even realise is happening to them

A new dating term? When will it end

It's bad news folks, as there's a new dating trend here to make your life a whole lot more difficult.

First we had 'ghosting', then it was phrases such as 'snowmanning' and 'sploshing' making its way into our dating lexicon, which is enough to make the strongest of us give up on ever finding love.

And now we have yet another trend to add to the growing pile: 'roaching'.

But what exactly is roaching you ask? Well, let me explain.

Modern dating feels like it's exclusive to dating apps these days, whether that is Tinder, Bumble or Hinge. Of course, we all know someone who met their partner at work or through friends; but for the vast majority of us, finding love involves scrolling endlessly through dating profiles while hoping someone swipes right on you.

Ah, the joys of modern dating (Getty Stock Images)
Ah, the joys of modern dating (Getty Stock Images)

And that is where roaching comes in.

What is 'roaching'?

Most people using dating apps are guilty of auditioning numerous matches to find out who they're best suited to. Which isn't anything too outrageous during the early days of chatting online or first dates, but carry on doing this with your various matches and you run the risk of roaching them.

Put simply, anyone who is secretly dating multiple people without disclosing it to a potential partner is roaching.

According to The Attachment Project, the name is taken from the idea that seeing one cockroach implies others will be nearby. Meaning that if you discover your situationship has one partner on the side, there's every chance they could have more.

"It’s inspired by the ickiness of seeing one of these nasty little bugs — but knowing when you turn the lights on, there are lots of them," Exclusive Matchmaking CEO Susan Trombetti told New York Post.

Unfortunately for us, roaching is very much a symptom of the modern world of dating, as people are less likely to commit to a relationship with the first people they're dating and more likely to shop around and make sure they've hitched their wagon to the best possible option.

Not what you'd want to be compared to when looking for love (Getty Stock Images)
Not what you'd want to be compared to when looking for love (Getty Stock Images)

'But isn't this just cheating?' you ask, to which the answer is 'no, not exactly'.

To be considered infidelity, two people would need to have established an exclusive relationship. Roaching on the other hand involves being purposely vague and non-committal about your relationship status.

How to tell if someone is 'roaching' you

According to a recent article from Metro, there are several red flags which could suggest you're being roached by a date.

These are:

  • They don't want to talk about the status of your relationship or exclusivity
  • They will be flaky or noncommittal over plans
  • They will often cancel plans at the last minute
  • They are often uncontactable
Featured Image Credit: (Getty Stock Images)

Topics: Dating trends, Lifestyle, Sex and Relationships, Community