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Medical conditions that could save Brits from being drafted if WW3 broke out

Joe Harker

Published 
| Last updated 

Medical conditions that could save Brits from being drafted if WW3 broke out

Ok, before we get started let's just say that we're not announcing that World War Three is about to kick off - so you can stop putting together a shopping list of things you'll want in your survival shelter.

That being said, the world is a dangerous and volatile place where seismic changes can occur seemingly out of nowhere.

That point is rather underlined by the latest developments in Russia, as Vladimir Putin has declared that he's facing an 'armed mutiny' from the mercenary army Wagner Group which was fighting alongside Russian forces in Ukraine but now appears to be marching on Moscow.

Yevgeny Prigozhin, Putin's former chef and now mercenary army leader, claims he has 25,000 troops at his command and has declared that Russia will soon have 'a new president'.

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Since Putin is unlikely to leave when politely asked that suggests that more conflict is on the way as these bloodthirsty war criminals battle for control of a country with one of the world's largest arsenals of nuclear weapons.

The bad news is you've been drafted into World War Three, the good news is the war will be over before they make you do the bleep test. Credit: SunFlowerStudio / Alamy Stock Photo
The bad news is you've been drafted into World War Three, the good news is the war will be over before they make you do the bleep test. Credit: SunFlowerStudio / Alamy Stock Photo

With that thought in mind there's some medical conditions which might get Brits out of being drafted into war if things go sideways.

First things first you'd have to pass their basic fitness test which comes in three stages, and stage one is one of the most inhumanly cruel forms of torture our species has ever devised... the dreaded bleep test.

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The level you'll be expected to reach is being able to run two kilometres (1.2 miles) in 11 minutes and 15 seconds or less after a warm up of 800 metres.

Then you'll have to throw a medicine ball weighing 4kg at least 2.7 metres from a seated position, you get three goes at this and they take your best result.

You must then show you can work with 50kg or more in a mid-thigh pull, so any conditions which mean you can't do any of these three tests ought to rule you out.

"Russia would totally win World War Three" says man who can't even beat one country. Credit: PA
"Russia would totally win World War Three" says man who can't even beat one country. Credit: PA
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Conditions such as heart defects and ones which cause partial or total loss of sight or hearing could also scupper a person's chance of being drafted into the third world war should it ever happen.

Mental health issues such as depression may also exclude a Brit from any potential draft, and the army has a full list of the conditions which could count you out of a potential war.

Let's keep our fingers crossed that it doesn't come to that, though, as kicking off World War Three doesn't really seem to be in anyone's best interests.

Meanwhile, a couple of years ago Vladimir Putin claimed that if it ever came to that then Russia would easily win.

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It really can't be said that he has a good grasp on his own nation's military capabilities considering he's utterly failed to take Ukraine and is now facing a potential coup from his mercenary army.

Featured Image Credit: Sipa US / incamerastock / Alamy Stock Photo

Topics: Army, World News, Health

Joe Harker
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