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Brits all cracking the same jokes as they face return of National Service

Home> News> UK News

Published 11:25 26 May 2024 GMT+1

Brits all cracking the same jokes as they face return of National Service

The idea has gone down about as well as a cup of cold sick

Joe Harker

Joe Harker

Somewhere in Conservative Party HQ there is presumably a panel of glass that should be broken in case of emergency, behind which lies a scrap of paper that says 'bring back National Service'.

Or there was, since less than a week into his general election campaign which has thus far been a rather damp disaster, Rishi Sunak has announced that if the Conservatives win, he will reintroduce National Service.

More specifically, 18-year-olds will be given the choice between spending a paid year in the armed forces, or doing unpaid volunteered work one weekend a month for a year, with organisations such as the NHS or the police.

Only about five percent would end up doing something in the armed forces, so for most people, it'd be the unpaid work a weekend a month.

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This would be 'mandatory', but according to Home Secretary James Cleverly, nobody would be sent to prison for not doing it.

It won't all be like this, you might have to do some unpaid work one weekend a month. (Getty Stock Photo)
It won't all be like this, you might have to do some unpaid work one weekend a month. (Getty Stock Photo)

Apparently this policy is supposed to give young people a 'shared sense of purpose', with Sunak saying the new model will provide young people 'life-changing opportunities' and the chance to learn 'real-world skills'.

Although, a Conservative win is likely not going to happen - at least if the official odds have anything to say about it.

According to them, Sunak basically announced a victory lap for Keir Starmer and Labour.

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But basically, if the Tories don't win the election, then they won't be around to force National Service on the next batch of 18-year-olds.

And plenty took to social media to slam the idea of getting people to do National Service.

We're not even a week in and this is where things are at. (Twitter)
We're not even a week in and this is where things are at. (Twitter)

A pretty common thread among the jokes was people blatantly saying they wouldn't show up for this supposedly 'mandatory' thing.

Whether it's clips of Mr Gilbert from The Inbetweeners saying 'you can if you like, but I won't be there', or Pineapple Studio's Louie Spence doing a runner down a fire escape, the general gist is that Brits aren't on board with this.

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Younger Brits at least, with many also joking that the policy will be popular among some of the older generations who also didn't have to do National Service who act like they fought in the Second World War and reckon it'd be a chuffing good idea for other people to be forced into such a thing.

While others also joked that trying to make the current crop of 18-year-olds do National Service would likely be a disaster.

On the plus side for Rishi people are talking about his ideas, slightly less positive is that everyone's laughing at him for it. (Twitter)
On the plus side for Rishi people are talking about his ideas, slightly less positive is that everyone's laughing at him for it. (Twitter)

Some said that the Tories should bring back some other things from yesteryear such as '11-year-old chimney sweeps', 'compulsory gout' and the plague.

"To be honest, getting shot at during national service might be your best chance at seeing a doctor under the Tories," someone else said.

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One person described it as 'mandatory Duke of Edinburgh without the walking', while plenty more picked holes in the details of the policy and the ways that this weekend unpaid work would likely screw over 18-year-olds with jobs.

Meanwhile, some others were saying their version of National Service would be to 'vote these f**kers out' on 4 July when the election was on, and if you want to do that you can register to vote here.

Labour has also called the decision 'desperate' and a 'unfunded commitment from a Tory Party which already crashed the economy'.

Featured Image Credit: Getty Stock Images

Topics: UK News, Rishi Sunak, Social Media, Politics

Joe Harker
Joe Harker

Joe graduated from the University of Salford with a degree in Journalism and worked for Reach before joining the LADbible Group. When not writing he enjoys the nerdier things in life like painting wargaming miniatures and chatting with other nerds on the internet. He's also spent a few years coaching fencing. Contact him via [email protected]

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@MrJoeHarker

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