Man Gets 'Stuck' In Beer Cooler, Proceeds To Drink A Lot Of Beer And Get Arrested
In a classic case of 'you would though, wouldn't you?' a man who was stuck in a beer cooler decided to get pissed, then got arrested.
Jeremy Van Ert became trapped after he wandered into the cooler, only for the door to automatically lock behind him as the Kwik Stop store doesn't sell alcohol after midnight.
When I say he was stuck, the door of the cooler was made of glass and the store is open 24 hours a day, so I guess technically he could have tried to signal for help at any point. But who wants to spend the night in without alcohol after they refuse to serve you?
"The subject found himself locked in the beer cooler, knew that Kwik Trip would not sell him any beer, so he decided to remain in the beer cooler," said Marshfield Police Chief Rick Gramza. "A customer came by the beer cooler at about 6 a.m. and saw him inside."
According to the police report, Van Ert's sesh saw him drink an 18 ounce bottle of Icehouse Beer and three cans of Four Loko. He also fell over a stack of 30 pack Busch Light cans. If you're judging him as a light-weight, it's worth bearing in mind that Four Loko ranges from 6 to 14 percent ABV.
Credit: PA Images
"This is unique, I've been here twenty years. I've heard of people being locked inside of buildings, never inside of a beer cooler," Gramza added.
After he was discovered Van Ert fled the scene of the crime. He is now being held in Wood County Jail on a probation hold from an unrelated case, as he had been required to remain sober.
Sure some would say he's a criminal, personally I'd say he's a hero. And he's not the only legend we've featured here at LADbible.
My person favourite is the guy who got his mates to the pub by copy and pasting his pints on Snapchat.
Credit: Jack Potter
Speaking to us about the prank, he said: "The first mate came in the beer garden and first thing he said was: 'Where the fuck's the pints, then?' So I told him to go buy them himself and stop being a cheapskate, and he stormed off to the bar."
It never gets old.
Featured Image Credit: Marshfield Police