Sex therapist shares the 10 questions to ask your partner in 2025 that could change things in the bedroom

With the festivities over and the new year kicking off, you might be spending the next month or so indoors to recover from the financial and social pile-on.

So, that might mean spending even more time with your partner at home than usual and maybe, even more time to get it on in between the sheets.

Well, that’s if you survive the ‘New Year Split’ period anyway. And while there are plenty of things you should ‘never’ do in the bedroom, here is something you should do - chat.

A sex therapist has shared the 10 questions to ask your partner in 2025 that could change things in the bedroom.

Vanessa Marin is a sex therapist who took to Instagram to help people ‘feel more connected’ in their relationship.

Enjoyment

First up, Marin suggests: “What do you enjoy most about our sexual experience?”

She says that having an understanding of what brings pleasure for your partner ‘can deepen intimacy’.

Fantasies

Apparently, we should be having a chat around: “Are there any fantasies you’d like to explore together?”

The sex therapist reckons asking this can ‘open new avenues for exploration’ in the bedroom.

Frequency

“How do you feel about our current frequency of sexual activity?” should be getting discussed, according to Marin.

Getting an idea of how often your partner wants to be getting steamy will help ‘align expectations and desires regarding intimacy’.

Get it on

Marin suggests asking one another: “What are your biggest turn-ons and turn-offs?”

Of course, it’s important to have a good knowledge of each other’s preferences and once you’ve got that right, she says you can ‘enhance mutual satisfaction’.

Experimenting

“How do you feel about trying new things in the bedroom?”

She says asking this and unlocking the door on experimentation can give you a gauge on just how far you can open it.

Emotions

Maybe try asking: “What role does emotional connection play in our sexual relationship?”

Having an understanding of the emotional aspect of it all for your partner ‘can strengthen the bond’, according to Marin.

History

The therapist encourages the question: “Are there any past experiences that affect your current sexual feelings?”

Getting this understanding of each other’s histories can make your bond stronger and ‘promote empathy’.

Outside or inside

“How do you feel about discussing sex outside of the bedroom?” is another one to ask.

Marin says being able to communicate about sex can ‘improve the overall relationship’.

The line

“What boundaries do you have regarding our sexual relationship?”

Establishing each other’s boundaries ‘is crucial for mutual respect and comfort’, according to the therapist.

Working together

And finally, Marin recommends asking: “How can we support each other in enhancing our relationship?”

Having this kind of conversation can apparently encourage ‘teamwork and collaboration in improving intimacy’.