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Jeremy Clarkson’s Diddly Squat Farm Shop prices in full where candles 'that smell of b******s' go for £50

Jeremy Clarkson’s Diddly Squat Farm Shop prices in full where candles 'that smell of b******s' go for £50

Jezza has all manner of goods on sale

Jeremy Clarkson's Diddly Squat Farm Shop is raring to go once more, with the air date for Clarkson's Farm Season Three confirmed by Amazon Prime Video.

The incredibly popular show, which is a cross between a comedy and a documentary, follows Jezza in his journey to become a full-time farmer.

After buying a farm shortly before the COVID pandemic - a place he renamed Diddly Squat Farm because of how little he managed to make from it - Prime Video has brought us two rounds of his attempt to become a successful agricultural businessman.

Premiering back in 2021 during lockdown, the former Top Gear man charmed viewers by showing a more personal side to him that wasn't really relevant when fronting the BBC car show programme or later, The Grand Tour.

One of the vital ways Jeremy and girlfriend Lisa Hogan tried to turn a profit with the farm was through the creation of a farm shop.

Dubbed the Diddly Squat Farm Shop - and currently shut to the pubic - it saw Clarkson go head-to-head with locals who weren't too pleased with the venture. This included the number of people turning up to check it out.

Season three of Clarkson's Farm will head to Prime Video on 3 May.

Kaleb Cooper and Clarkson.
Amazon Prime Video

Fans of the show fan who can't wait that long will be able to head to the farm shop itself when it reopens in March.

The farm shop sells all manner of goods online, from vodka and crisps to hoodies and wooden spoons.

The prices vary too. My advice would be to treat it like any other farm shop; it's not Lidl or Aldi.

Top of the pile is a Limited Edition B******s Candle set which will set you back £49.50.

It comes with two candles entitled 'This Smells Like My B******s' alongside a bag of coffee.

The dubiously named candle.
Diddly Squat Farm Shop

Customers who opt for this one will be happy to know the candle doesn't in fact smell of b******s. Rather, it combined cedar wood and amber infused with smoky incense and oak moss. Thank goodness.

Slightly cheaper than the candles is a Diddly Distressed Hoodie, featuring the farm's tractor logo and name. That'll cost you £48.

A Chadlington FC Football Shirt, which is sponsored by the farm, will set you back £42 and the Diddly Squat Farm Gin in a Tin (50cl, 40% ABV) will see you spend £41.

The gin comes in three flavours - maris otter malt, coriander seeds and fuggles hops; juniper, beetroot, apple and dill; and orange peel, nutmeg and all spice.

The alcohol trend continues, with the farm's own Hint of Hot Gin (70cl, 40% ABV) selling for £39. As the name suggests, it's got chillies in it, so it packs a little kick. Cow Juice Vodka (50cl, 40% ABV) also sells for £39.

The travel mug and wooden spoon set. Quite nice really.
Diddly Squat Farm Shop.

Right at the other end of the scale is a pint of milk - or as Jeremy calls it, cow juice - for £1.20. The catch with that is that it can only be bought at the shop and can't be delivered.

Here's a full list of everything else you can currently get, in price order:

Prices and stock accurate as of 2 February, 2024



  • B******s Candle - two for £39
  • Box of 24 packs of Diddly Squat Farm crisps - £37.40
  • Diddly Squat Shandy x 12 (330ml, 2.5% ABV) - £36
  • Summer Meadow Candle - £32
  • Grey Long Slevved Distressed t-shirt - £32
  • Travel Cup and Wooden Spoon - £31
  • 'I am a f****r' t shirt - £28
  • Tractor Bag Combo - £27
  • Suede Cap - £26
  • Diddly Cufflinks - £26
  • From Diddly with Love x4 (gin set, 35ml each, 40% ABV) - £26
  • Diddly Chopping Board - £24
  • Bee Juice and Soap - £22.80
  • Distressed Tractor Design t-shirt - £22.50
  • This Smells Like My Christmas Balls Candle - £22.50
  • Cream Bobble Beanie - £22.50
  • My Burning Log Candle - £22.50
  • Supreme Black Beanie - £22.50
  • Green Flame t-shirt - £22.50
  • B******s candle - £22.50
  • Grey Beanie - £22.50
  • Pigs Might Fly Book - £22.50
  • 'I am a f*****r' cap - £22
  • Navy bobble beanie - £22
  • White tractor t-shirt - £21.50
  • Diddly Squat Soft Waffle Knit Beanie - £21
  • Trucker hat - £21
  • Diddly Squat - Til' the Cows Come Home book - £20
  • Kids t-shirt in green - £20
  • Black cap - £20
  • Kids t-shirt in white - £20
  • Green cap - £20
  • Bee Juice Rum (20cl, 40%) - £19.50
  • Diddly Squat Whishky (20cl, 40%) - £19.50
  • Apron - £19.50
  • Tractor socks x2 - £18.50
  • Diddly's All Terrain Mug and Bee Juice Bites - £18.50
  • The Best Tractor tote bag - £18.50
  • Animal bag - £18.50
  • Diddly Squat Travel Cup - £16
  • Enamel mug - £14
  • Pepper and Map Tea Towel - £12.50
  • Birds of Diddly Squat Collection - £12
  • Wooden Spoon - £9.90
  • Christmas Tea Towel - £9.50
  • The Best Tractor tea towel - £9.50
  • A Year on the Farm book - £8.99
  • Diddly Card, Gift Tag and Wrapper Paper - £7.80
  • Ground Coffee - £6.95
  • Diddly's Delicious Seasonings - £5.90
  • Rapeseed Oil (250ml) - £5.85
  • Chilli Pasta Sauce - £5.80
  • Chilli Chutney - £5.80
  • Winter Spices and Seasonings - £5.80
  • Smoked Chilli Mayo (sold out) - £5.25
  • Homemade Jams and Chutney - £4.80
  • Diddly Squat Farm Shop Cards - £3.50
  • Cow Juice 24/7 (in-shop only) - £1.20
Featured Image Credit: Amazon Prime Video / James D. Morgan / Getty

Topics: Jeremy Clarkson, Clarkson's Farm, Amazon, Amazon Prime, TV and Film, Food And Drink, Shopping, Celebrity