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Expert reveals the real reason why narcissists won’t admit when they are wrong

Home> News> Health

Published 17:30 16 Jan 2025 GMT

Expert reveals the real reason why narcissists won’t admit when they are wrong

It's not something they'd ever want to do

Joe Harker

Joe Harker

An expert has spoken about the reason why a narcissist won't admit they're wrong, even if you're able to show them they've made a mistake.

For plenty of people, being proven wrong by someone close to us is a fairly unpleasant experience, but it's not exactly the end of the world. Yes, you thought something was right but it turns out something else actually was and now you know.

You may feel daft for a bit, but that'll subside soon enough and you can move on.

Unless, of course, you're dealing with a narcissist as according to relationship coach Christina, they would rather move heaven and Earth before admitting they were wrong.

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She runs a YouTube channel called Common Ego and explained why a narcissist wouldn't be able to admit when they got something wrong.

Proving a narcissist wrong would puncture their 'false persona', which they wouldn't like. (YouTube/Common Ego)
Proving a narcissist wrong would puncture their 'false persona', which they wouldn't like. (YouTube/Common Ego)

'Admitting the mistake challenges their false persona'

"For most of us it's a no-brainer, just admit the silly mistake and move on," the relationship coach said of being shown you got something wrong.

"For a narcissist it's more complicated because admitting the mistake challenges their false persona, and there's a reason that false persona exists, a big reason. That false persona is a defence mechanism to protect them from vulnerability.

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"So imagine a narcissist like an astronaut with a very purposeful pressurised environment in their space suit, every time you ask them to admit a mistake it's like you're throwing a rock in their direction.

"A rock that could cause a crack in their helmets and expose them to an environment they can't survive in, or at least they don't know how to survive in."

She explained that a narcissist would 'need that false persona like we need oxygen', meaning a mistake that punctured their persona would be catastrophic for them.

While many of us would get over being proven wrong quickly it'd be much more devastating for a narcissist. (Getty Stock Photo)
While many of us would get over being proven wrong quickly it'd be much more devastating for a narcissist. (Getty Stock Photo)

Narcissists need 'control over the narrative'

Twinned with the need to feed their false persona was a need to maintain control, and getting something wrong and being shown they made a mistake can rob them of that control.

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Christina added that a narcissist would need 'control over the narrative' where they would get to decide what was right and wrong, and showing they were wrong could take this control away from them.

There has been much discussion of narcissists and the red flags you would need to watch out for when interacting with them, and having people around them who believe pretty much everything they say is something to look out for.

Christina herself has talked further about the questions a narcissist would struggle to answer honestly, including asking them whether or not they're actually happy.

She also said that a narcissist would sometimes come out with a 'word salad' when they couldn't actually come up with a response, so look out for that too.

Featured Image Credit: YouTube/Common Ego / Getty Stock Images

Topics: Mental Health, Sex and Relationships

Joe Harker
Joe Harker

Joe graduated from the University of Salford with a degree in Journalism and worked for Reach before joining the LADbible Group. When not writing he enjoys the nerdier things in life like painting wargaming miniatures and chatting with other nerds on the internet. He's also spent a few years coaching fencing. Contact him via [email protected]

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@MrJoeHarker

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