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Topics: Mental Health, Community, Social Media
Joshua Nair
There's a straight-forward test you can carry out to spot if someone in your life is a narcissist.
The subject of narcissism has been at the forefront of conversation in social media over the past few months, with more people becoming aware of the condition.
While many initially used the term to describe people with unpleasant traits, it's now widely recognised as a mental health condition, called narcissistic personality disorder (NPD).
A number of people on social media have shared their experiences with the condition after being diagnosed by a medical professional, providing an insight to the life of an actual narcissist.
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While most people can display traits of narcissism, you usually have to show multiple signs to be confirmed as someone with the disorder.
So, how do you spot one?
Firstly, a narcissist, or someone with NPD, can be defined as someone with a grandiose sense of self-importance.
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NPD is classified as a mental illness, and according to the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-V), it is related to a 'pervasive pattern of grandiosity.'
According to the latest trends on social media, which has also been confirmed by experts, there's a sure-fire way to identify those with the condition.
The occasion test is the method people are using to figure out who the narcissists in their life are.
It's to do with special occasions, whether it be a birthday celebration or a big meal, all you have to do is tell the person about it and pretend it's coming up.
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Users online have advised people to make a note of the suspect's behaviours and actions in the days leading up to it.
Essentially, if you find that they aren't reacting well to the attention going off them and see a shift in behaviour, they're likely a narcissist.
You'll probably notice a negative turn in your feelings during this time too, which could be emotional sabotage.
Sydney clinical psychologist Dr Maria-Elena Lukeides explained to Femail that it's a 'genius' method to spot narcissists by keeping tabs on emotional manipulation.
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She spoke about partners in particular, and that if a narcissist sees you getting excited about something that doesn't involve them, they may lash out or try to ruin your mood.
The doctor explained: "This is a tactic (whether they're cognisant of it or not) that aims to keep their partner emotionally dependent and reinforces the narcissist's sense of control and importance."
She added that they project their own negative feelings onto their unknowing partners.
She noted that healthy partners would 'celebrate' with you and feel your happiness instead of the opposite, even if they aren't involved.
"The key difference between healthy/unhealthy is empathy and the ability to support your individuality versus a need to control and overshadow you," Dr Lukeides explained.
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Massive romantic gestures, especially early on, or making you feel unique, can be nice as a relationship blossoms.
But narcissists will often 'love-bomb' like this, before becoming emotionally distant while you're hooked.
Playing the victim card, even when they are clearly wrong, can be a sign of narcissism.
A lack of empathy, a need to be admitted, struggles to accept criticism and gaslighting are common in these situations.
Narcissists want to be at the centre of your universe, and this may involve cutting you off from family, friends, and other connections outside of their own.
Everyone's wrong sometimes, but narcissists will do everything they can to avoid admitting defeat according to Dr Lukeides.
Phrases like 'I'm sorry you feel that way' are common, as she added: "They rarely apologise sincerely and often blame others about their own shortcomings or mistakes."
If you're always afraid to express how you feel in the fear of their mood flipping, or worrying about their reaction when you do something on your own, the doc says you can be left 'feeling rejected, criticised and anxious.'
Any of these signs could signal a toxic relationship, according to Dr Lukeides.