Largest Known Human Poo Is 20cm Long And Dates Back To A 9th Century Viking
| Last updated
The largest human poo we have on record might astound, shock, surprise or repulse you.
It's so infamous and revered that it is housed in a museum and has even been likened to as valuable as jewels from the British monarchy.
The Lloyds Bank coprolite is a human turd that dates back to the 9th century and studies have suggested it belonged to a Viking man.
The historical poo, which is referred to in the scientific community as a large paleofaeces, or a coprolite, or a desiccated human dung specimen, was uncovered in the UK back in 1972.
Archaeologists from the York Archaeological Trust were excavating an area that soon to become the York branch of a Lloyds Bank. It was there they came across this incredible find.
How they managed to distinguish it between just rocks and other items found in the dirt is anyone's guess, but the specimen was handed over to officials who did some tests, who made some very interesting findings.
Firstly, the important stuff.
It measures 20cm long and 5cm wide, which is absolutely outrageous when you think it managed to come out of someone's backside intact like that.
While there will be plenty of people who will claim to have expelled something far larger after a heavy night of drinking or after completing one hell of a food challenge, this one has been officially recognised.
So the next time you push one out that is longer and wider, call the authorities.
The next thing researchers discovered was what the man was eating. They were able to discover the poo was derived from a diet of mainly meat and bread and the outside was described as 'moist and peaty'. That's a mental image if we've ever heard one.
But it seems like the man who did this historic and record breaking turd wasn't exactly in tip-top shape. There were 'several hundred parasitic eggs' found in the poo, which suggested to researchers that the 9th century man was riddled with intestinal worms.
Gill Snape, a student conservator on a placement with the York Arcaeological Trust, said: "Whoever passed it probably hadn't performed for a few days, shall we say. This guy had very itchy bowels."
They reckon he was a Viking because York was formally a Viking settlement back in the 800s and was called Jórvík.
In 1991, York Archaeological Trust employee and paleoscatologist (yes, that is an actual profession), Dr Andrew Jones, made this incredible declaration: "This is the most exciting piece of excrement I've ever seen. In its own way, it's as irreplaceable as the Crown Jewels."
We s**t you not.
The turd is now housed in JORVIK Viking Centre in York and suffered a devastating incident in 2003 when a school trip visited. A teacher accidentally knocked the display and the poo came crashing down and broke into three pieces.
Officials have since restored it to its pooey glory and you can see it back intact now.