Palliative care worker explained most common regret dying people have about life

A palliative care worker has shared the most common regrets people have on their deathbed.

Australian best-selling author Bronnie Ware wants to make people feel a lot more comfortable about the thought of death.

Her book The Top Five Regrets of the Dying attempts to put readers in a 'regret-free' state of mind by showcasing what truly matters most.

In a 2023 interview on Dr Rangan Chatterjee's podcast, she reflected on the 'truths' people share at the end of life and why hearing them can jolt us into reassessing everything.

From work and family to identity, she explains that these messages often only 'land' when we’re ready.

So are Ware’s 'top five regrets of the dying' five separate regrets, or do they all flow from one central mistake?

Best-selling author Bronnie Ware noticed the same themes emerging with end of life patients and what they regretted (Getty Stock Images)

Ware said the five most common regrets she heard over eight years caring for dying people were:

I wish I’d lived a life true to myself, not the life that other people expected of me

I wish I hadn’t worked so hard

I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings

I wish I’d stayed in touch with my friends

I wish I’d allowed myself to be happier

Ware's best-seller 'The Top Five Regrets of the Dying' attempted to put people who are going through a tough time at ease (Getty Stock Images)

Ware said: "If you are honouring that first regret — living a life true to yourself — then you’re naturally going to prioritise work–life balance. You’re not going to work as hard, you’re going to do things that make you happy, and you’re going to stay in touch with your friends.

"So I really feel the others flow from that."

She went on: "That regret about working too hard wasn’t about not loving their job. It was about letting work become their whole identity.

"When work was taken away, there was nothing left — no hobbies, no relationships they’d invested in properly."

People regretted worked so hard (Getty Stock Images)

She said an important part, and probably the most difficult, is coming to terms with the fact that you're going to die one day.

"You are going to die. And when you truly face that fact, it gives you courage. The fear isn’t death itself — the fear is reaching the end and knowing you didn’t honour your life or give your dreams a go.

"People assume they’ll have time later. But that’s not how life works. We may not get those years in retirement, and if we wait until then to live, we may never get the chance."

Ware reminded her readers that 'people are allowed to be happy' and that 'they deserve their own permission to be happy'.