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'Self-aware' narcissist shared the common phrases he used when manipulating people

Home> Community

Published 13:35 17 Sep 2024 GMT+1

'Self-aware' narcissist shared the common phrases he used when manipulating people

Steven Ingram says these nine phrases will be used to 'convince you that you are the problem'

Joe Harker

Joe Harker

A 'self-aware narcissist' has laid out the most common phrases he's used to manipulate people, and said he's seen plenty of others use the exact same words.

If you're done watching that delightful TikTok of the Royal Armouries where they're using Gen Z slang to describe everything, then you might like to learn a little about the human condition too.

TikToker @the_bat_wolf, otherwise known as Steven Ingram, said that he guaranteed that anyone who'd ever dated a narcissist had heard all nine of the phrases he was about to rattle through.

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"Narcissists will use these phrases to convince you that you are the problem and not them, who really are the problem," he explained.

You might be hearing these phrases a lot (Getty Stock Photo)
You might be hearing these phrases a lot (Getty Stock Photo)

First on the list was 'why are you starting fights with me', with Steven saying that 'narcissists will use this one any time you bring up anything they did to hurt you'.

In a similar vein, the second common phrase was 'why are you always overreacting', which once again seems to shift the blame back onto you and make it seem like you're always at it.

As for phrases three and four, Steven explained that narcissists would say 'this conversation is over, I'm leaving', and 'yeah I guess I'm just a piece of s**t' to end chats they no longer wanted to be in.

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"You know what? Believe whatever you want, because that's what you're going to do anyway," was the fifth phrase the self-aware narcissist warned people they'd encounter.

If you're hearing these nine phrases in your relationship it might be a problem.
If you're hearing these nine phrases in your relationship it might be a problem.

The next two you might hear were questions, namely 'why are you so sensitive' and 'why do you have to make everything into such a big deal' - so beware of those words.

At number eight on the list was the simple declaration that 'you're crazy', while entry number nine was pretty much any variation on 'you don't appreciate me'.

The self-aware narcissist admitted that he'd used all of those phrases in his relationships, adding that 'all of the toxic partners I've ever had in my life' had done the same.

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It's by no means the only video he's made about narcissistic behaviours to be watching out for.


He's also spoken about two things people do that really get on a narcissist's nerves.

The first is simply being happy, as he admitted that 'we don't like to see you happy' and that seeing someone else happy was 'one of the most hurtful things that can happen to me in my life'.

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The other thing he said narcissists couldn't stand was seeing someone else be successful 'because that means you don't need me and I need you to need me'.

Featured Image Credit: Tiktok/ the_bat_wolf / Lionsgate

Topics: TikTok, Mental Health, Sex and Relationships

Joe Harker
Joe Harker

Joe graduated from the University of Salford with a degree in Journalism and worked for Reach before joining the LADbible Group. When not writing he enjoys the nerdier things in life like painting wargaming miniatures and chatting with other nerds on the internet. He's also spent a few years coaching fencing. Contact him via [email protected]

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@MrJoeHarker

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