Ibiza nightclub owner Wayne Lineker has posted a rather bizarre plea for a girlfriend on social media, having shared an extensive list of requirements for any prospective partners - telling them they must be 'intelligent but not boring', have 'no baggage' and not as old as he is 'as that would look weird'.
Lineker, 57, posted on Instagram to say his family have decided he now needs a girlfriend for his 'own sanity and health', launching into a lengthy set of criteria peppered with plenty of #humblebrags.
The post, which was accompanied by a selfie, begins: "Ok - Let's start this off like I'm normal: strong nice loving personality."
But it continues on to outline 'more important' factors, saying: "You must like older men but only me...You have to be a worldie and above 30 (Ok 28 29 could work) but not my age as that would just look weird.
"You must like to travel and to fly business class and stay in incredible hotels. Be prepared to give up your career or job or at least be able to work from a laptop on a tropical beach somewhere.
"You will need to spend the summer in Ibiza and the winter in Dubai with 2 weeks in UK for Christmas and new year with the families and holidays to the Maldives.
"No baggage as mine are all grown up. A dog is acceptable but will need a passport.
"You must be able to cook as I love cooking, especially Waitrose ready made meals."
Lineker said he would accept 'house music and R&B lovers only', saying he wouldn't tolerate any heavy rock or pop music, and that Netflix viewers should be fans of 'real crime' and shows like Money Heist.
"No chick flicks watch them with your mates," he added.
"You need to be confident enough to be able to go to the front of the queue in nightclubs and accept a table and free drinks from the owners.
"You will need a driving license to share a Bentley and a Lamborghini Jeep (pending)."
Other requirements for his future girlfriend included the fact she must love the gym, health food 'and have body definition as I will have soon', have never shared a teeth whitening post and not be on any dating sites.
"I'm not on Only Fans so you shouldn't be too," he said.
The post continued: "Accept and love my children and grandchildren and realise no more kids for me... (never say never though).
"You must be able to let my PA @davehodges10 book all yours and our flights and purchase items online for you. You just need to send a link to him.
"You must be able to accept my friends even @tonytrumanibiza as I will accept yours... accept I have to reply to girls DMs not just guys...
"One last thing. Your geography needs to be on point as girls that think Lincoln is in Wales is not good. Be intelligent but not boring. Outgoing suits."
If you're interested and think you fit the bill, get in touch, I guess?
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