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Swinger explains worrying 'wife snatching' trend that can happen when in the lifestyle

Home> Lifestyle

Published 16:07 3 Sep 2025 GMT+1

Swinger explains worrying 'wife snatching' trend that can happen when in the lifestyle

Although, not everyone might be mad about it

Jess Battison

Jess Battison

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A swinger has explained the worrying ‘wife snatching’ trend that can happen in the lifestyle.

While swinging has been around for, well, ages and the term itself was coined in the 1950s, it feels like it’s been more recently having its moment in the mainstream conversation.

From ‘spicy cruises’ to whole holiday resorts and festivals, there has even been swinging scandals that have led to entire TV shows. So, with this new sparked interest into the form of non-monogamy in relationships, we can start digging into the different ‘trends’ and sexy goings on.

Although ‘wife snatching’ maybe isn’t so sexy for everyone, as this swinger on TikTok explained just how it works and what the signs might be.

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VistaWife shares explainers and insights into the lifestyle as a swinger herself.

She shares advice on swinging and open relationships (Instagram/@vista.wife)
She shares advice on swinging and open relationships (Instagram/@vista.wife)

“Let’s be clear, this doesn’t happen all the time but just watch out that it can happen,” she warned in one clip.

The swinger said it starts just like any normal situation, with a couple speaking to another couple.

However, she added: “With the intentions to only play with the wife and leave the husband out.”

VistaWife then went on to point out the signs that this might be going on, in case other swingers want to keep themselves clear from any wife snatching behaviours. Or, if that’s perhaps more your kind of thing.

“If you’ve started a group chat and all the attention and messages are directed to the woman of the couple,” she said. “That could be a tiny little indicator that something’s not quite right.”

And if the wife snatching catches you off guard and starts to kick off ‘while you’re playing’, then this is when ‘your codewords come in handy’.

“If one of you feels really uncomfortable, use one of your code words and that’ll stop playing,” VistaWife advised.


From a deep dive across social media, rather than from my own experience (I promise), other swingers say that wife snatching isn’t exactly ‘extremely common’ but rather is ‘common enough’.

Other swingers in the comments of VistaWife’s post said they’ve had the same thing happen to them at a club and it’s ‘put us off’ going again.

One even wrote: “Almost every single conversation we’ve had with couples.”

While another said ‘communication is everything’ as some people might be more than OK with it.

Many pointed out that it happens a lot in their chats as plenty agreed that communication really is important.

Featured Image Credit: Instagram/vistawife

Topics: TikTok, Sex and Relationships, Lifestyle

Jess Battison
Jess Battison

Jess is a Senior Journalist with a love of all things pop culture. Her main interests include asking everyone in the office what they're having for tea, waiting for a new series of The Traitors and losing her voice at a Beyoncé concert. She graduated with a first in Journalism from City, University of London in 2021.

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@jessbattison_

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