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The world of speed dating is a bizarre and often tragic place. You're constantly faced with rejection on the meat markets of Tinder or Grindr and the other apps just don't seem to know what an actual person looks and acts like - they just pair you with any old person.
Short of actually going out and meeting someone somewhere or talking to someone on the bus (nobody likes that), you could always try something a bit different. Speed dating, for instance.
Not enough for you? OK, why not double down and combine the awkwardness of speed dating with the awkwardness of sharing a taxi with a complete stranger.
Basically you get in a taxi and drive down one of the capital's most romantic roads (they've done their research, via a sample of 22,000 drivers) for six minutes whilst you get to know someone, then you stop and another person gets in.
This - of course - sounds horrible. But it could just work. If you really don't get on with someone, you're only stuck with them for six minutes (the red light in the taxi means that you can't jump out at some traffic lights) before someone else shows up. You might change your mind in that time, perhaps?
If you're interested, the first event will begin on Friday 16 February (in case you're really desperate after Valentine's Day) at JuJu, Chelsea Gardens, London.
At 7pm the taxis will all move off and take the couples on a tour of roads including Albert Bridge, Waterloo Bridge, and The Embankment (which are apparently some of the most romantic roads London has to offer).
You'll have a load of different dates (and travel about 2 miles in their taxis if London's traffic has its way) before ending back right where they started to end the event.
Event organiser Robert Ryall said: "In my experience the most successful speed dating events are those which offer something a little different. I've always wanted to host a mobile event so it's great working with TAXIAPP to pull it off."
Sean Paul Day (whose name sounds like the holiday we both need and deserve) is one of the founders of TaxiApp UK - a not-for-profit co-operative - and he hopes that the event will help people find love, but also help out the taxi industry.
He said: "We're really looking forward to it. We take couples on dates every day, so we know all the best spots - it will be great to demonstrate our knowledge for the evening and be part of something a bit different!"
Whatever you say, guys.
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