Ten signs to identify that your partner might be cheating on you
A divorce coach has revealed 10 possible signs which could point to your partner engaging in unfaithful behaviour.
If you have a gut feeling something's up, then listen to it because it could be right.
Even more so, if your partner is ticking most of these 10 boxes, then you may want to think about getting a bag packed - or a relationship counsellor, if you're one of the more forgiving types.
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Break-up and divorce coach for women, Sarah Woodward, has explained the 10 potential signs to look out for which might point towards your partner having wandered astray.
They're not spending quality time with you.
In an interview with Fabulous, Woodward explains that one of the first signs is if you've 'stopped socialising together or doing activities that you previously enjoyed together'.
She continues: "They may have started socialising more with friends, suddenly have a new friend they’re spending time with or start talking more about a colleague at work.
"Perhaps they’ve stopped asking you how your day was or what you’ve been up to and show no interest in your life. There’s little conversation between you anymore and the banter between you has gone.
"They don’t tell you they love you anymore and all the affection has stopped."
They stay out longer or say they have to work late.
This one shouldn't come as a surprise - it's the classic move we see pulled in many rom-com films.
Think Hugh Grant's character in Bridget Jones' Diary using the excuse he has to 'finish' reading over something to usher Bridget out, before she hears a sound in the bathroom and the truth is revealed.
Or if your partner has sudden 'work trips' they're called out to at the last minute.
Woodward noted: "It feels like they don’t want to spend any time at home, and when they are away, you don’t hear from them, or you can’t reach them."
They're secretive.
Phone usage can also be a tell-tale sign of the trust having gone between yourself and your partner.
"They take it [their phone] everywhere with them and this is a change in behaviour. They’re taking calls at odd times of the day and stepping outside to speak. Maybe they’ve changed the password on their computer," Woodward continues.
"Is your gut telling you that they’re trying to hide something from you?"
They become super interested in your plans.
On one hand, it may seem rather sweet - they want to know what you've got coming up this weekend - how considerate.
On the other hand, they could be sussing out their next opportunity to sneak out or sneak someone else over.
Woodard says: "This could be an indication that they’re trying to plan in some time with someone else whilst you’re not around as it saves them having to make excuses.”
They're hitting the gym more.
Let's not lie, once you get into the comfort and safety of a relationship, you often no longer have to worry about dressing to impress as much.
They've seen you at your worst, they've seen you at your best, and they (supposedly) love you all the same.
However, if your partner suddenly takes to the treadmill or starts pumping iron as if they've had a hot poker shoved up their nether regions, it's probably either because they've had a health scare, have been watching too much Instagram or TikTok and feel pressured, suddenly develop a deep love for exercise or, as Woodward warns, are trying to impress a new set of eyes.
She says: "Are they concerned about their weight and more careful about their diet and what they eat - whereas previously they wouldn’t give it a second thought?”
They've upgraded their wardrobe and are dressing to impress more.
If your partner is cheating, perhaps they're seeing someone with an alternate style or they simply want to impress them.
If they're dusting off their nicest pair of shoes, 'bought new clothes' or are 'taking a lot more care about how they dress', then this could be a sign of someone else being in the picture.
They're splashing the cash.
As we all know too well from Love Actually, just because your partner buys a nice, expensive necklace doesn't mean it's for you.
Woodward warns that if your partner's taking out more cash or spending more frivolously they may be 'going for more meals, buying gifts' or even 'paying for hotels with cash'.
The bedroom activity has slowed down or halted completely.
Maybe they're tired, maybe something traumatic has happened to them, or maybe they're just getting action elsewhere.
It's a sensitive topic, but if they're ticking any other of the nine boxes, maybe it's a sign they're more sexually attracted to someone else.
Woodward also notes that the reverse could also be a potential sign they're cheating: "Or it could also be that your partner suddenly wants to have more sex and has become more adventurous."
They're putting even more effort into your relationship.
By this point, it seems like anything your partner does could signal they could potentially be cheating. Putting extra effort in? Surely that's a sign of devotion and love? I hear you ask.
Alas, Woodward explains it could be a sign of guilt.
"It may be that they’re showing you more attention than normal and being more affectionate, helping more with the household chores, or buying you flowers and gifts for no reason, which is a change to their normal behaviour." she says.
They've lied and you caught them.
Honesty is the best policy - but sadly, not everyone abides by it.
And when sayings like, 'A leopard never changes its spots,' exist, it's hard to know whether to trust a liar again.
If you catch your partner in a lie and they become 'defensive or angry' or create an 'elaborate story with a lot more detail than is necessary' or even stoop so low to gaslight you, Woodward explains that alarm bells should be ringing.
If any of these 10 signs alert that gut feeling, don't pack a bag just yet, as Woodward advises that it is best to sit down and try to communicate 'to hopefully put your mind at rest'.
To anyone who's even thought about being unfaithful to their partner, remember the grass isn't always greener and all that - surely it's easier to just break up with them before you hop the fence?
Topics: Sex and Relationships, Money, Health, Technology, Phones, Mental Health
Poppy Bilderbeck