Look, even though it seems like some weird kind of movie plot or story from a friend of a friend ‘who knows someone’, the reality is a lot of people do get weird stuff stuck up their bums.
And when I say ‘a lot’, I mean thousands with it said nearly 4,000 people in the US are hospitalised each year and Brits have cost the NHS over £3 million with this issue.
So, while you’re still curating that perfect round-up of your travels from last year or showcasing your best foodie pics, here’s the year dump that matters: the worst 25 things people got stuck up their bums in 2025. It certainly beats the TikTok trend anyway.
Yep, the US Government has released its running tally from doctors of the objects they remove from people’s rectums.
Advert
This ‘trend’ has been documented for decades with the American Journal of Emergency Medicine estimating that nearly 39,000 hospital visits a year are related to rectal foreign bodies. It’s said that most patients are middle-aged and male with over half of the cases involving sex toys.
Sometimes the cases tend to go on a bit because of people trying to fix their situation themselves, meaning things like tweezers or even coat hangers show up.
Defector sifted through the U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission’s database of emergency room visits and so here’s what’s thought to be the ‘worst 25’ of those other than sex toys (such as the likes of a 24-inch-long dildo):
1. Screws and nails
2. A dog chew toy
3. Beard clippers wrapped up in a plastic baggie, cited as being used as constipation relief
4. A baton
5. A turkey baster
6. A shampoo bottle (listed more than once)
7. A dental pick
8. A wine stopper
9. A corn cob holder
10. A highlighter
11. A magic wand toy
12. Marbles
13. A film canister
14. A sandal
15. A doorknob
16. A lightbulb, inserted glass side first which ‘due to the suction effect’ got ‘sucked up’
17. A flashlight
18. A vape pen
19. Two pencils
20. A corncob-style pipe
21. Uncooked pasta
22. A piece of nose hair trimmer
23. A pair of glasses
24. An egg
25. A rectangular travel toothbrush holder
Doctors and medical professionals aren't wanting to shame people by the way, it's more just of a warning to be careful where you're sticking objects - and for the love of God, don't shove other 'tools' up there to get them out.
Jess Battison