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Swingers explain the one myth that they wished people knew wasn't true about their lifestyle

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Updated 09:40 11 Jun 2025 GMT+1Published 09:39 11 Jun 2025 GMT+1

Swingers explain the one myth that they wished people knew wasn't true about their lifestyle

The married couple says the norm can be very different from what people expect

Jess Battison

Jess Battison

A married couple have opened up on the one myth about their swinging lifestyle that they wish people knew wasn’t true.

Like pretty much anyone else nowadays, Bella and Jase host their own podcast, discussing their relationship and non-monogamy. The high school sweethearts are ‘passionate advocates’ for the acceptance of this type of lifestyle and share recommendations for ‘spicy cruises’ and resorts.

On social media, they create plenty of content about swinging and often address common misconceptions or anti-polygamy opinions. But while they do love it, they previously revealed the one ‘downside’ to sharing their partner with other people.

And in a 2022 clip, Jase (wearing his upside down pineapple T-shirt) asked his wife: “What is one swinger myth you wish people knew was not true?”

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The pair create content about swinging. (4ourplay.official/Instagram)
The pair create content about swinging. (4ourplay.official/Instagram)

“People think that swingers go and it’s an open f**k fest and everybody f**ks everybody,” Bella said. “And it’s not like that at all.”

She went on to explain that many couples that live a swinging lifestyle ‘do have to find some type of friendship connection or some type of extra connection’ rather than just having a physical attraction or sexual chemistry.

“It’s not like you just see another couple and you’re like [gestures eye to eye and points away],” Bella added.

Although, she did point out that this does ‘sometimes’ happen but it’s just ‘not very often’.

“And that’s definitely not the norm,” she assured. “So I wish people didn’t think that all it was was just about sex.

“It’s more about the community and more about making friends.”

Bella then joked that the sex ‘is an extra’ to this connection swingers tend to make with one another.

The pair try and dispel myths surrounding swinging. (4ourplay.official/instagram)
The pair try and dispel myths surrounding swinging. (4ourplay.official/instagram)

But it seems it’s not this myth about how exactly they end up swinging with others that’s a downside to it all, but rather money.

The pair previously explained that while some people don’t seem to be aware, it’s apparently ‘super expensive’ to have that kind of lifestyle.

It’s worth bearing in mind that the pair do tend to go on their fair share of cruises (which can’t be too cheap). But Bella said that not only do you need to pay for membership to clubs, but you also need to pay for door fees, drinks, and of course hotels.

Plus, she said there’s also the cost that comes with generally looking appealing to others with the likes of outfits and grooming all needing to be factored in.

Featured Image Credit: Instagram/4ourplay.official

Topics: Lifestyle, Sex and Relationships

Jess Battison
Jess Battison

Jess is a Senior Journalist with a love of all things pop culture. Her main interests include asking everyone in the office what they're having for tea, waiting for a new series of The Traitors and losing her voice at a Beyoncé concert. She graduated with a first in Journalism from City, University of London in 2021.

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@jessbattison_

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