Relationship expert issues stark warning for couples over new 'hotwifing' trend
A relationship expert has issued a stark warning for any couples who are considering experimenting with the 'hotwifing' trend.
You might not be familiar with the term 'hotwifing', but the consensually non-monogamous lifestyle trend has taken the world of social media by storm in recent weeks.
So much so, that Google searches for 'what's a hotwife' have increased by a whopping 450 percent in the last month.
Many couples claim the choice to open up their relationship in the form of hotwifing has transformed their marriages, but it's definitely not something that everyone can get on board with.
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Whether you're just curious what it's all about, or you're actually considering dipping your toe into the world of polyamory, relationship expert and dating platform founder Jessica Alderson has some words of wisdom to consider before delving in.
What is hotwifing?
Hotwifing is an increasing popular trend which involves heterosexual married women having sex with other men, with their husband's consent and approval.
The idea is that the man in the relationship gets a sense of pleasure and pride from his partner having sex with other men; often including his own friends. Sometimes the husband will be present to watch.
People who subscribe to this lifestyle have bizarrely compared it to 'letting your friend test drive your car'.
"He gets to see how well it rides. He’s got to give it back, but it creates a sense of pride. You get a little taste of what my life is like," one said in an interview with MailOnline.
The equivalent of hotwifing is 'hothusbanding', which involves the man in the relationship having sex with other women, with his wife's consent and approval.
Relationship expert's hotwifing warning
Jessica Alderson, who co-founded the dating and relationship advice platform So-Synced, believes hotwifing can be hugely advantageous to couples who are keen to move away from the traditional stereotypes of marriage and children while still nurturing loving relationships.
However, there are risks involved with adopting the lifestyle and she warns it's important to weigh up whether these risks are worth it before getting started.
"When both partners are truly aligned, secure in their bond and have a very strong foundation of communication, it can add to the relationship," Alderson told LADbible. "But if it comes from a place of avoidance, boredom or trying to fix deeper issues, it pretty much always ends up doing more harm than good."
Even those who have fully thought through the pros and cons of opening their relationship to hotwifing or hothusbanding could still face some unexpected hurdles when fantasy becomes reality.
"Jealousy often hits harder in reality than in fantasy. We can’t always predict how we’ll feel about a situation until we’re actually in the moment. Even if both think they’re fine with it, unexpected emotions can surface in a big way. This alone can cause a relationship to unravel," Alderson warned.
"You also have to be crystal clear about your boundaries. If they aren't discussed in detail, lines can be crossed that are incredibly hard to come back from. You can also have situations where one partner feels pressure to continue to keep the other happy. When this happens, resentment often builds over time as one person silences their needs. So yes, hotwifing is not without its risks for sure and couples need to go into it with eyes wide open."
Topics: Sex and Relationships, Lifestyle
Emma Rosemurgey