Experts give honest answer when asked about how long sex should last on average
Sex experts have dished on the answer many people would like to know: how long should sexual intercourse last on average?
There have been so many theories about this, from people saying it should be 'more than 15 minutes' to an hour, or even longer.
One study, perhaps unsurprisingly, suggested that men and women had very different views on how long sex should last.
And it also doesn’t help that things like pornography skew our view of sex.
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Figures from LADbible's 'For F**k's Sake' campaign revealed that 77 percent of Gen Z watch porn, while 60 percent of daily viewers claim it’s 'shaped their expectations of real-life sex', with adult content creators seemingly going all night long and having multiple rounds of sex.
Appearing on Steven Bartlett's Diary of a CEO podcast, psychiatrist Dr Alok Kanojia, sexual health expert Dr Rena Malik, and adult film director Erika Lust sat down and discussed how long doing the dirty should really take.
How long should sex last on average?
"If you look at the average [length] of sexual intercourse, it's three to seven minutes," Dr Kanojia revealed, stating that 'about 50 percent of women' want it to last less than 15 minutes.
"I see a lot of body dysmorphia," he went on to say, exploring the difference between what’s realistically wanted by men and women, and what we see on screen. "It's like getting to that level in both men and women, unrealistic expectations about body, unrealistic expectations about performance that creates shame."
"There's just a lot of bad information out there," he added.
Dr Malik also said there’s an average time it takes to ejaculate, which she stated is around five to six minutes, while women might need closer to 14 minutes.
"There's definitely a disparity there that needs to be addressed. If you have an average duration in your relationship, then the female party needs to be prioritised so she can reach climax," she said, before noting that's 'not the end goal for everybody'.
What is the ‘normal’ amount of sex people should be having?
Again, it is completely up to the individual, but several experts have shared their thoughts on the age-old question.
It comes as a 2024 study suggested that the ideal marker couples should 'aim' for is around once a week.
Charlene Douglas, a sex therapist who's worked as an expert on Married at First Sight UK, told LADbible Stories: "So oftentimes, I'll go to a bar and people will find out that I'm a sex therapist and they'll say to me, ‘How many times should you really be having sex like in a week?’
"And they're all waiting for my answer. Everyone leans in waiting for me to give that number to work out whether they're in the normal range or not."
The expert said that 'statistically speaking', around once a week is the 'average frequency for most couples', but that number 'goes up and down' based on different factors, such as stress and financial worries.
"If you're not having sex in your relationship, it doesn't mean it's all doom and gloom. It might just be that you need to have a conversation if that is something that's important for you," Douglas added.
Meanwhile, Dr Nicole McNichols, a professor of human sexuality at the University of Washington, told the Modern Love podcast: "When we look at the benefit of sex to relationship well-being, it doesn’t increase after about once a week.
"That's not an astronomical amount of time."
Topics: Sex Education, PornHub, Adult Industry
Britt Jones