Man rubbishes 'biggest myth' about quitting drinking with advice shared on how to stay sober beyond Dry January
After what might have felt like half an age, there’s just a few hours left until Dry January finally comes to an end.
And if you made it this far, a huge well done. Or perhaps it’s just been another month in your sobriety journey, so a big congrats if so.
But for whatever reason you haven’t drank this last month, you might be considering carrying it on for a little longer; maybe ditching alcohol has led to you experiencing a 'huge, huge difference' in yourself, maybe it’s improved your relationships or maybe the benefits to your body are too good to ignore.
Although, despite the benefit going sober brings, it isn’t necessarily the easiest thing to do. So, to round off Dry Jan, we spoke to a number of sobriety advocates to get their top tips on going sober for the long-run, with one rubbishing the 'biggest myth' about quitting booze.
Advert
Enrich, don’t restrict
Having already told LADbible it’s one of the common mistakes people make when they try out the month-long challenge, Dr Alex George says giving up alcohol ‘shouldn’t be a restriction’ on your life. Advising to plan from ‘a point of enriching your life’, he encourages asking yourself: “How can I add to my life?” while cutting out drinking.
It’s something Issy Hawkins echoes, as she advises: “Try and find some new things to focus on. You can deepen that relationship with yourself a little bit while you’re taking that break. Focus on the gains; you’re saving money, your health is improving, you’re getting a glow.”
And addiction expert and psychiatrist at rehab clinic Delamere, Dr Catherine Carney, says it’s helpful to find new hobbies.
“Have you always wanted to run a marathon or learn to play the drums?” she adds. “Use your newfound time to try something new.”
Issy sums it up best as she says: “Something we tend to focus on when we're stopping drinking, whether it's just like for a month, or if we're sober, curious, whatever it is, is that we focus a lot on what we're losing at our life. And it's like, what are you gaining?”
Think about the money you’re saving on booze and the new things you can spend it on, the improvement to your health and sleep, all of those gains are going to be ‘really positive’.
Find your community
Building a support network and finding others on the same journey as you can be a big help with advocates recommending ‘having a buddy system’ or immersing yourself in ‘inspiring stuff’ on TikTok or social media.
For Ricci and Alisha, they’ve found community in opening up an Instagram page and launching the podcast, Black & Sober.
On their account, they only follow ‘sober pages or public figures that are sober’ which means there’s ‘so much positivity’ and reminds them ‘why they are doing this’.
“I'll go to my personal page and see all my friends with champagne and drinking, or even with a hangover. A lot of the time on Instagram and social media, you only see alcohol glorified. You never see someone with their head down the toilet or suffering in bed with a hangover,” Alisha adds.
Issy also agrees, saying: “I’m a massive advocate for community. I believe some people can do it alone but doing it with other people is super empowering because you feel like we’re all trying to do it together.”
Be honest
For many, going sober means awkwardly avoiding questions of why or having to come up with explanations to pals when they offer a drink. And so, you might be tempted to tell a quick lie to make things easier but Jay Motty says this ‘gets you nowhere’.
“If it's something you can't avoid or you don't want to [drink], I would be honest with the people that you're socialising with, tell them you're not drinking, let them know,” he recommends.
“Say, ‘look, I'm not drinking tonight’, or ‘I'm quitting drinking for a bit’. Whatever the sort of explanation is, just let them know you are not drinking. That makes it easier as well.”
While he says you don’t have to be ‘broadcasting it’, it’s worth letting those you go out with know. But if you are struggling, ‘just leave’ as he says it’s not worth forcing yourself through something.
And Dr Alex recommends doing a bit ‘of pre-planning’ so you have a ‘stock answer’ for people. He says you can disclose as much as you want but ‘just by giving a clear answer, people leave you alone’ whereas skirting around can ‘leave room for ambiguity’.
“But equally, you don't have to,” he adds. “The people that are going to challenge you or push you, they’re not your friends anyway.”
Stay social
Like that idea of being restricted, it might be hard for some people to figure out what they’re going to do with themselves without alcohol.
But socialising with friends doesn’t have to centre around booze, there’s so many other things you can do and keeping that contact can be a huge help.
“What I did is I stopped drinking and socialised even more. I made loads of plans to see friends at brunches and going out and doing walks,” Dr Alex says, as he found it aided keeping his mind off of it and helped boost his mood.
Jay also adds it’s the ‘biggest myth’ that you can’t socialise with your friends properly without a drink. Enjoying going to the football more than ever after years of games he can’t remember, he says it might actually be a ‘relief’ to your pals that you’re not drinking.
“When you've had too much to drink you don't know what you're doing and you might need almost like a babysitter. A lot of them will have seen what you're going through,” he adds.
“So, when you tell them ‘I'm not having a drink’, they'll probably be happy for you. They'll probably be a little bit relieved.”
Speak to a professional
With going sober being more difficult for some, it can be really helpful to seek professional help. That could be attending Alcohol Anonymous (AA), seeing what help your GP can provide, accessing resources online or visiting a clinic, among other options.
Dr Carney says: “Speak to a professional. If you’ve found it harder than expected, or you want to delve deeper into your relationship with alcohol, speaking to someone can help to understand what you’re experiencing.”
Having gone to AA, Ricci says to not ‘be afraid’ to ask for help or find support.
“Don't be embarrassed. You may need to come out of your shell a little bit, you may need to be vulnerable,” he says.
“Take one day at a time. For some people, it might start off as even one hour at a time, two hours at a time, just make the start, just stop thinking about the negatives, or ‘I can't’, because you can.”
Dry January is a campaign developed by Alcohol Change UK, you can find support and resources for taking part here.
Please drink responsibly. If you want to discuss any issues relating to alcohol in confidence, contact Drinkline on 0300 123 1110, 9am–8pm weekdays and 11am–4pm weekends for advice and support.
Topics: Dry January, Health, Lifestyle, Alcohol, Mental Health
Jess Battison