Couple's Marriage Stronger And Happier After Husband Transitioned To Become Woman

A couple in the US say their marriage is stronger and happier than ever since the husband transitioned to become a woman.

Taylor Vanmalsen, from Michigan, knew she wanted to be female from an early age and told wife Sarah about this desire at the start of their relationship.

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Sarah, 27, had therapy for eight months to come to terms with this, before ultimately becoming the driving force behind Taylor's transition in 2018, following the birth of their daughter Valerie.

Taylor, 29, used her life savings and a credit card to spend $29,000 (£23,042) on surgery to reposition her brow and remove her Adam's apple, as well as getting a breast augmentation and lip filler; though full gender reassignment 'isn't on the agenda yet'.

Having been unsure about how the change would affect the marriage, both Taylor and Sarah said their relationship is now stronger than ever.

Taylor said: "I want to show other trans people that you can still be happily married. Trans partners may look a little different on the outside, but they are still the same person but happier.

"I am now becoming the real Taylor, I decided to keep my birth name which I hated as a boy. Ironically people used to always say, 'That sounds like a girl's name'.

"A lot of people are interested in our sex life and wonder if I have had gender reassignment, but that isn't on the agenda yet. My main priority was presenting as a female so I can be me."

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The inventory manager added: "Sarah was the first person I ever told and she was thankful for my honesty. It was weird at the beginning because she stayed with me even though she knew my secret.

"I feel like I was cheating her out of a spouse before, because I was always down and just a shell of myself. But now I am able to be me, and give Sarah all my love and affection."

Sarah said the 'secret' and subsequent transition caused her a great deal of anxiety, but now they're both happier than they've ever been.

She said: "I lived a pretty sheltered life and didn't know what trans was, so when Taylor first told me I just said 'OK, thank you for letting me know', and we just got on with it.

"But as the years passed, Taylor got more and more depressed and the 'secret' was really bothering her. I began suffering with anxiety because I feared I may return from work one day and Taylor may have hurt herself, she was that low.

"I knew the only way to put an end to the depression would be a transition, but I wasn't able to fully come to terms with it overnight. The therapist helped me overcome my anxiety and I also had to work on what it will be like.

"I discovered it wouldn't matter and all of my 'what ifs' were worked on. I thought I would be sad but I couldn't be happier. It is refreshing to see Taylor truly feel happy and slowly but surely gain some confidence in who she really is."

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She added: "People think I am awesome for staying in the relationship but I didn't have to say yes to marriage - I knew who Taylor was from the beginning. It would have been a shock if she had told me ten years later!

"I fell in love with Taylor, for Taylor and it is amazing to see how much happier she is. We will be open and honest with Valerie reading kid-friendly books but to us, it doesn't matter as she has two parents who love her - no matter what."

Topics: Interesting, Community, marriage

Jake Massey

Jake Massey is a journalist at LADbible. He graduated from Newcastle University, where he learnt a bit about media and a lot about living without heating. After spending a few years in Australia and New Zealand, Jake secured a role at an obscure radio station in Norwich, inadvertently becoming a real-life Alan Partridge in the process. From there, Jake became a reporter at the Eastern Daily Press. Jake enjoys playing football, listening to music and writing about himself in the third person.

@jakesmassey